Feeling As Fragile As A Small Twig On The Ground.

Song of the blog: Send Some Rain_Unkown

I love this song.

Send some rain
Would You send some rain
Because the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade

Would You send a cloud
Thunder long and loud
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid

But maybe not
Not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if thats the case
We'll give thanks to you
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for you
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread
Give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups and fill them up again tonight

Wrap us up
And warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy rooves
Let us slumber safe from danger's veiw this time.

Or maybe not
Not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if thats the case
We'll give thanks to You
With gratitide
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view
If no roof is over head
And if we never taste that bread.

Oh the differences
That often are between
Everything we want and what we really need

So grant us peace
Jesus grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between our allies and enemies tonight

Or maybe not
Not today
Peace might be another world away
And if thats the case
We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You.
That we are blessed beyond what we could every dream
In abundance or in need.
If You never grant us peace.
But Jesus
Would You please?



Isn't that just beautiful? Listening to it, and singing it, brings tears to my eyes almost every time.

Sunday today was wonderful. It was special to me. I always love Fast and Testimony Meeting. And today was no different. There was so much that stood out to me, so much that hit me.

The one that hit me the hardest was in Relief Society our teacher this week said a quote, "You can believe IN God. But it's another thing entirely to BELIEVE Him." We not only need to know what He is saying and promising, we need to believe Him. We need to believe that He will fulfill His promises. He will. God will ALWAYS fulfill His promises.

I feel so fragile right now. Like a breeze could blow me away. Or anyone could walk up and step on me and I would be in pieces. I remember times when I have felt so close to my Heavenly Father, like He was sitting right next to me, comforting me, holding me up. There have been times when He has literally helped me walk when I just didn't have the strength to do it on my own. And yet I still have a hard time believing Him when He promises that He will always be there. There are days like this when I feel so fragile, so quiet, like thin glass, or a small twig on the ground. Like I can't do anything. And so I need Him. I need my Heavenly Father on these days just to keep breathing. Without this gospel in my life I don't know I could have survived to 19 years old. I would be a small ball in the corner with nothing to live for. But God upholds me. He keeps me up. He is the rock that I build my life on. Without Him I would simply wash away.

I know that I am important to Him.  Also talked about in Relief Society today were the two greatest comandments. "The first Great Comandment is to love thy God with all thy heart.." "The second is to love thy neighbor as thyself." That is how important His children are to Him. We are the second greatest comandement. To love eachother. To take care of eachother. It is a comandment that we are loved and cared for. And we in turn are comanded to love and care for others. "The more we love, the more we are able to love." The more we excersise the muscle of our heart, the more we can use it.

I also had the thought again, "I can't believe I'm actually home." When I lived in Nebraska for those 3 horrible months my junior year of high school, and then we moved back to Parsons, Kansas, I remember saying all the time, "I can't believe I'm actually home!" It felt soooooo good to be back in a place that I was accepted and loved. I was home. And now I am finally here at BYU. I am living my wildest dreams. Going to college used to be among my most impossible dreams. But I did it. I'm here. And I can't believe that I'm finally home. I am home.