Today I Learned To Count.

Song of the blog: The Fear You Won't Fall_ Joshua Radin

1

It doesn't take nearly as long as you would think to bike 3 miles. Today I had my first day of work, and it was amazing because it was work. For those of you who don't know, little may there be, I work at K-Mart. I am not allowed to say anything bad. *Cough Cough* But I am in no way required to say anything good. And really I only have good things to say. =)

2

Funny the things you learn as you grow up. Also, funny how technology has grown since I was a little girl. Little do you know, K-Mart can see the very color of your eyes. Don't steal. Just sayin'. They will catch you.

3

It is possible for your mouth to run out of saliva. It is a very uncomfortable sort of sensation. Just thought I would let you know.

4

My co-workers are all great. Taylor just got married this last summer, Joanne is a sweet 50 year old woman that reminds me of Emma's father in Jane Austen's novel Emma. So sweet and caring. My boss Nadine is all smiles, all the time, but I can tell that she has another side that can be all business if you screw up. Dan is the security guy, and he is really nice. Megan in Jewelry is a sweetheart. She just finished writing a novel and is in the process of getting represented so she can be published. I have so many personalities around me that I know work will never be boring. I am going to love it here.

5

Quotes:

Never knock on Death's door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!

Matt Frewer, as Dr. Mike Stratford in "Doctor, Doctor"

If you wish success in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother and hope your guardian genius.

Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719)

Things are seldom what they seem, skim milk masquerades as cream.

W. S. Gilbert (1836 - 1911)

 Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question.

Albert Camus (1913 - 1960)

Some things have occured.

Song of the blog: December_ Collective Soul

Yesteerday. Food was among the gracious blessing that came upon Jacob and I. We were very thrifty I think, and it gives me hope for a good time grocery shopping with him for the rest of my life. Full of it I gather. =)

I have nothing witty to say, nor anything smart, nor anything other than contentness and a little bit of anxiousness. I am still waiting for my boss to call me and tell me when I can start working. A phone call I have been expecting since Monday evening. (Blasted long background checks. I hope they don't look into that vacation I went on to Mantigue....) But today I watched Mansfield Park (BBC version), and it was a fairly good production of it. I never get tired of Jane Austen. How can anyone? She is genius. And I work at K-Mart. Ah, life.

But Jacob had some exciting fun taking random turns last night and going everywhere but where we wanted to go. We do get to talking he and I. :)

Snapshot Worth Blogging Of:

I was standing in the kitchen, doing something insignificant. Jacob comes in and begins to dance with me. There is no music and I giggle like an idiot. Good thing though, I am marrying a man that will never think me an idiot. Good choice Heaven. Good choice.

Moments like these I wish I could capture and show my daughters when they come to me one day, "Mom, how do I know he loves me?" "Well darling, he will dance with you in the kitchen when he darn well feels like it."

Quotes.

When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet.
    Stanislaw J. Lec (1909 - 1966), "Unkempt Thoughts"

ICONOCLAST, n. A breaker of idols, the worshipers whereof are imperfectly gratified by the performance, and most strenuously protest that he unbuildeth but doth not reedify, that he pulleth down but pileth not up. For the poor things would have other idols in place of those he thwacketh upon the mazzard and dispelleth. But the iconoclast saith: "Ye shall have none at all, for ye need them not; and if the rebuilder fooleth round hereabout, behold I will depress the head of him and sit thereon till he squawk it."

     Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

     Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Walking isn't a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage.

     Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
 

Broken dials and shopping cart aisles.

Song of the blog: This music in the background of the title page of my Mansfeild Park DVD.I liked it 20 minutes ago...

Blogs are for updating people on your life right? Sadly, I don't want any of you to know about my life.so there.

Just kidding.

My life is boring. School less, jobless, and moneyless. Oh how I wish moneyless meant full of money!! Whoever made that word needed a dose of positive pills. (I think I need some too actually. Actually. Actually. Actually.....)

But guess what guys? Jacob and I are currently in process of registering at Bed Bath and Beyond, Kohls, and Wally World!!! We also have a date that will hopefully stick. It is called May 19th. Don't go buying your plane tickets yet though, the date has changed three times. Warning. So until you get an announcement in the mail, mark not the calendar my friends. XP

At the current moment I am in want of triple a batteries, without these I am doomed to watch the title screen of Mansfeild Park and never watch the actual movie. Oh disaster!

Another tidbit tad: Jacob Willis was fixing my table this morning and he dropped a wrench in his forehead. A nice gash was left there that has bled through two band aids. But my table isn't creaky anymore?

Boxing In a Ring of Flowers

Song of the blog: Rhythm of Love_ Plain White T's

So when I haven't seen someone for a while, I am usually excited to see them. Never have I felt that quite so much as I do today. I have not seen my wonderful fiance in about 2 and a half weeks. It is silly to think of that as such a long time, but it sure feels like forever. I get to see him tonight and I am beyond happy about this.

In other news, I found the perfect dress. It is on JJ's House a site that sells dresses at the lowest cost you could ever dream. I have posted a picture on here before but that was just a pretty dress. The dress I have found is THE PERFECT DRESS!!!

 This site claims that they can do any customization, and I have emailed them about sleeves before, so I thought, hey no problem! Right??? Nope. Of course they would find a problem. I went through literally EVERY dress on their site. I find this one. It still takes my breath away every time I look at it. But according to them adding short sleeves would mess up the dress. And on top of that they are claiming it has a corset back. WHA???? No it doesn't. That is definitely a zipper on there...... Or am I blind?? But I am in love with this dress. I will be dreaming about it forever if I don't find a way to purchase it. So here is my plan: Beg. I will beg them to put tulip sleeves made of the same lace with a white fabric underneath on this dress. I will beg for a zipper back. They can add 100 dollars to my purchase if they want. Honestly even if they do that the dress would be only 300 dollars. I am going to beg. If that doesn't work then I will buy the dress as is and find someone who can do it. That will be much more difficult. I really hope begging works actually. Tracking someone down would kind of suck.... =D But I found a dress guys!!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!

This. Is. A. Carnival. Cruise.

More wedding updates:
     My Grandma Linda used to own a catering business and now she helps out at her local college with the culinary students. She has said worry not about the food or the price of the food at your reception. Worry not. She will take care of it. I LOVE MY GRANDMA!!!!!!
     My Daddy has a friend named Terri that owns a newish company that does photography and videography. She is going to do our wedding for only the price of the plane ticket and somewhere to stay. Daddy has taken over the responsibility of that cost.
     My Mom and my stepfather Kurtis are thinking seriously on the idea of giving Jacob and I a honeymoon cruise to the Mexican Riviera or the random tropical place of our choosing. O.O I know right?????

So basically my wedding is going to be amazing. And I can afford to spend a tiny bit extra on my dress if I have to in order to get what I want. Yay!

After The Thought Day

Song of the blog: Boston_ Augustana

Disney World. The Perfect Honeymoon Getaway. That is, if you can afford it. poo

This. Is. A. Rocking Chair.

Or is it?

I got to see Nicole Dodd and family yesterday. It was the Saweetest day of my week. =D

And I finally figured out how to get the pictures and videos off of my phone. =D

Logan was a space knight. ;D

Luke likes to pose. =D

And Jack liked that chair. =D

Sadly I didn't get any picture of sweet Caraline Dodd. I assure you she is just as cute as these little guys. =) 

Nicole made a comment that I don't blog as much anymore maybe because I don't have as much drama to blog about. My thought? Whats wrong with no drama? I rather like it. ;D

RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!!

Charm is a glow within a woman which casts a most becoming light on others. ~ John Mason Brown

You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question. ~ Albert Camus

When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around. ~Willie Nelson


"I'm a big child at heart. I think it's important to stay that way and not lose the wonder of life." ~ Pam Grier


I am more lost in wonder than ever.~ John Huston


And all the loveliest things there be come simply, so it seems to me. ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay




Funny Pages!!!!!

You're My Favorite Color

Song of the blog: The Dynamo of Volition_ Jason Mraz

Dresses and shoes and ribbons! Oh My!

Needless to say, I might love planning, but I can't wait until it's over. Did you know that people like to live their weddings through you? Yep! People to plan other people's weddings to fit their idea of perfection! I feel like one of the lucky people who has not run into too many of these wedding planners, though I have run into a few. I told Jacob last night that I don't want anything extravagant. I want simple, yet beautiful, and a little bit quirky. My shoes for instance. I want purple sequin converse. I don't even know if they exist. I love this idea. It matches my personality perfectly.

This. Is. A. Cat.

Another thing I have learned in the last few weeks? None of it really matters. At the end of the day, I'm going to marry Jacob Willis, and that is the whole point. The little details are just fun. =)

So this week I:
Saw Harry Potter 7 part 2. Three times. (Why? How? I really don't know.)
Got stranded on the side of the road with my fiance for HOURS. (Not as fun as it sounds.)
Went to our friends' (Rachel and Neil Adams) house in Oswego, KS via being pulled by a rope by their van.
Hung out with Rachel and the kids, and my brother Billy,  while Neil worked with Jacob on the engine.
Found out that a whole day's work was for naught because the real problem is a cracked Head Gasket.
Had a dance party with the kids and Rachel and my brother. I wish I could put the videos on here, they are way too cute for words, but alas they are on my phone. This process still confounds me.
Stressed about money.
Prayed about a lot.
Received some answers, and a lot of comfort.
Had my testimony that the Lord knows and cares about each and every detail of our lives strengthened very much.
Slept on couch cushions pushed together on the floor. =P
Cleaned Rachel's kitchen to de-stress.
Began the process of FINALLY getting my license! I should have it next week.
Lots of other things. 


This. Is. A. Bunny.

Just to add, Hoodwinked has the most predictable ending! I knew the whole time that it was the bunny! (Spoiler?)

Imagine this with short sleeves and a scoop neckline. I'm kind of in love with it. Though nothing is decided. ;D  (jjshouse.com for about 340 dollars including tax and adjustments. =) Yay me!







RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eternity's a terrible thought. I mean, where's it all going to end?

Tom Stoppard (1937 - ), Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (1967)

 

I have a responsibility to pass on to the next generation what I learned from my teachers, ... It keeps me young and reminds me where I came from. Teaching young artists is like giving water to a flower. ~ Isaac Stern

When you feel things deeply and you think about things a lot and you think about how you feel, you learn a lot about yourself. ~ Fiona Apple

 

The feeling must come first. If you actually feel rich, if you have a deep inner conviction that you will always have all that you need, it will be so. ~ Donald Curtis

I have just been given a very engaging Persian kitten…and his opinion is that I have been given to him. ~ Evelyn Underhill

 

 I've never compromised who I am not ever. If I've gotten anywhere in my life it's been on my own merits. ~ Cher

 

My husband and I have never considered divorce... murder sometimes, but never divorce.~ Joyce Brothers

In marriage do thou be wise: Prefer the person before money, virtue before beauty, the mind before the body; then thou hast a wife, a friend, a companion, a second self. ~ William Penn

 

Funny Pages!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chiffon Postcards

Song of the blog: March Into The Sea_ Modest Mouse

Wedding Planning. People expect you to know the date of your wedding the minute the ring is on your finger. First question out of everyone's mouth, "When is it? Have you set a date?" "No. He just proposed 15 minutes ago Mom." "Oh Ok." O.o

But really, I love it. I love looking at dresses and choosing colors (dark purple, white, and black for accents) and thinking about shoes (purple sequin high tops) and all the other shtuffz (website, announcements, registries etc.). =) I love the whole life spinning and doing wonderful things and moving forward. I love looking at apartments that I won't live in for another year. I love thinking about how I will decorate my living room. I love thinking about being married to Jacob Willis. =)

This. Is. A. Sock.

 I like this guy's attitude on life. =)

I have never planned my wedding before. I didn't think, "Someday when I get married I want this and this." So I was not prepared for the sudden obsession of all things wedding. I could browse announcements for hours, and wanna know a not-secret? I do browse for hours. Jacob probably laughs at me a lot as I text him things like, "We are so registering at Bed Bath & Beyond." and as I tell him about what kind of dress cut I think I want. I even want to make a little cookbook of recipes I have made up so that he will eat well. =) I am going to seriously dig married life. Now if only the next year could speed by, I would be fine with that. Anyone who really knew me before would never recognize me now. I have officially gone off the deep end of wedding planning.

This. Is. An. Insane. Person.

This will be me if I keep this up. ;D

Really though. I'm loving this. =D

RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!!!!

I begin to think, that a calm is not desirable in any situation in life....Man was made for action and for bustle too, I believe.

Abigail Adams (1744 - 1818), letter to her sister, Mary Smith Cranch, 1784

I am in earnest; I will not equivocate; I will not excuse; I will not retreat a single inch; and I will be heard.

William Lloyd Garrison (1805 - 1879)

His mother had often said, When you choose an action, you choose the consequences of that action. She had emphasized the corollary of this axiom even more vehemently: when you desired a consequence you had damned well better take the action that would create it.

Lois McMaster Bujold, "Memory", 1996

You don't need to outdo the competition. It's expensive and defensive. Underdo your competition. We need more simplicity and clarity.

Jason Fried, Keynote Speech, SXSW 2006

Funny Pages!

Narcissistic Strawberries

Song of the blog: If I Die Young_ The Band Perry

Maybe it's me trying to make up for all the blogging I was supposed to be doing all summer, or maybe I just can't help but think as a I eat chinese food and stare at the diamond ring on my finger, but for some reason, tonight I am thinking aloud. Very loud. With one message. Trust In The Lord. So deep. I know.

I'm just sitting here, looking at this shiny thing that is the symbol of:
Taken.
Done Dating.
Found Prince Charming.
The Slipper Fit.
Bada Boom
Bada Bing
Put Her In White And Make Her Blush.
May 15th.
Done.
Finito.
Just the Beginning.

Just the beginning it is. I used to dream of this. No, I mean, I used to have dreams where random guys would propose to me and I wore white and never got to see the wedding. Then I woke up, shuddered, and moved on with life. These dreams varied from creative to horrible. In one I wore a dress from the 80's that was 10 sizes too big. Horrible. In another one the dress was perfect but the guy was addicted to picking up hookers. I never daydreamed about my wedding. I had nightmares about it. Funny thing it is.

This. Is. Cinderella.

The Lord stayed with me, he put some wonderful couples in my life, some real Fairy Tale Mascots. I've talked about some of them before. They are sweethearts, they are happy, they are in love years and years later. They never stop cherishing each other. Their marriages defy the physics of our modern world.

So am I still terrified? No. Not at all. Every day Jacob Willis shows me even more to love him for. Every day I find more reasons to marry him and spend the rest of eternity with him. Every day I see why they say this is magical and wonderful and above all things real. I will admit, I was a critic. I secretly thought at the end of every happily ended movie that it was fake wishful thinking of the world, and I wished it was real. I'm sad now for that version of me. I wasn't trusting the Lord, I wasn't trusting at all really.

Basically I feel like a changed woman. I still have my fears, everyone does, it's hard to get around that natural human tendency. It is my view of the world that has changed. I have always had hope for my life, always had ambitions, always had dreams and visions of what I am working toward and the wonderful place my life is in. Now I know that I don't have to do it alone. You don't know what that does to change you until you experience it.

Necessary song: First Day Of My Life_ Bright Eyes

This. Is. Our. Temple.

Random Quotes!!!!!!

"If there was one word in the dictionary to describe you with, it would be sweet. You are one of the sweetest people I have ever met." Jacob Willis to me today. =)

"In you I have found a best friend. You are always there for me, to listen when I complain and reassure me that life gets better, to let me know when I'm sad that there are elephants somewhere that are weeping as well, and to make me laugh." Jacob Willis in the letter he gave me before he proposed. =)

To love deeply in one direction makes us more loving in all others.

Anne-Sophie Swetchine

 
Perhaps the feelings that we experience when we are in love represent a normal state. Being in love shows a person who he should be.

Anton Chekhov (1860 - 1904)

 
To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.

Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970), Marriage and Morals (1929) ch. 19

 
Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what it loves.

Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)

 
 
No funny pages this time. Sorry Friends. =)

The Flow

Song of the blog: Take Me Out_ Franz Ferdinand

There is a flow to the world. It's the way a life progresses. Mine kind of went like this:

1: Born.

2: Move Many Times.

3: Join the Mormons.

4: Move Some More.

5: Find My Person.

6: Graduate High School.

7: Move to Utah.

8: Attend BYU.
9: Find More of My Person.
10: Discover the Kind of Guy I Want In Life.
11: Find That Guy.
12: Date That Guy.
13: Wait For That Guy To Propose.
14: Say Yes.
15: Wear the Ring.

So far life has been a pretty good ride. =]

Everyone keeps asking me the same question. "How did he do it???"

Here you go everyone.

He wasn't even supposed to come into town. I was fully looking forward to a weekend of Netflix Movies and possibly giving myself one awesome pedicure. Maybe even getting ritzy and taking the whole 5 dollars that I had and going to get an Italian Smoothie from Java. But alas, my weekend alone was not to be. I was in the middle of nodding off to The Princess Protection Program when Jacob and his sister Jessica knocked on my door. Happiness much? Yessum. A night of McDonald's and a movie followed.

This. Is. A. Waterfall.

This is the actual waterfall that this occurs next to. ;)

Day 2 we went to Joplin and my Jake had to go check out a place that Neil Adams had told him about that would do a good alignment on his car for cheap. He dropped me and Jessica off at the mall and we looked around and fell in love with things we couldn't afford. Jacob came back and I showed him the band that want, sadly, I don't know how to get pictures from my phone to my blog YET. So that band will be a mystery to yous alls for a while. I had told him before that I wanted a square (princess cut) diamond but in the store I tried on a circle cut and liked it with my band better. But I didn't say anything. (hahahaha) Jacob was hungry so we went to Chick Fillet and he got it to go. It was over 100 outside and I definitely had a problem with that. But he was persistent, which is a quality I love him for. He said he had seen this park on the way that looked perfect to eat at. I gave in, and so did Jessica. Several minutes later I am no longer believing the, "I saw it on the way bit." We passed the road that I knew we had taken almost 4 years ago on our first date when we went couching. (See previous blog when I told this story.) So I said, "Hey! Thats the road to the waterfall! We should stop by and take in the nostalgia." Winky smily face. "Sure." Well, turns out thats where he was going. haha We went and looked at the place where the couch had been on that day that I with all honesty thought he was a bit odd. "Ah, Nostalgia." I said. We turned back to go where he said he had seen some shade and what do I see? A perfect little shady spot with a couch and table. Complete with table cloth and a little vase with some flowers made from silver wire. (Curtosy of Neil Adams) I was blown away. It was perfect. Close to the waterfall and everything. =)

This. Is. A. Couch.

Hahahaha Not THE couch, but a great one.

Then I realize that I have forgotten my phone. I need it because this is too cute to NOT take pictures. (One day I will figure out how to get pictures on here from my phone.) He goes to get it from the car for me (how sweet :) and I take the oh so romantic chicken sandwiches out of the bag. When I see him walking back I see he is also carrying a plastic bag and in it looks like a little box. My heart jumped for a second, but he just sat down and acted like everything was normal, so I stayed quiet. We ate and laughed about clueless I was. There was no car business. Neil was there and he had his van parked so I would have the least chance of seeing it. The only thing I didn't know was where in the world Jessica had run off to. She disapeared before we even got to the surprise. Jacob brushed this off with a different "maybe" every time. I thought about asking him what was in the bag, but mostly I just forgot about it. I sat back and looked at the light filtering through the green trees and had a flashback to when I was 13. I was sitting in front of the T.V. watching the movie that the sister missionaries had brought to show us about the Restoration. I watched as Joseph Smith was attacked by Satan, and I was in awe at the beauty of the light filtering through the trees as The Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ descended, saving him, and speaking to him. I smiled at the memory of the first time I had ever felt the spirit and I stared at my own personal tree light. Jacob asked me what I was thinking about and I told him the story and said, "You know that feeling when you just know something is right?" "Yeah, I do." And we smiled at each other and it was a moment.

Then he really started acting strange. He scooted all the way over away from me on the couch and asked me to scoot over next to him. I thought it was weird but I went along with it. Then he hands me a letter. I smile at his cuteness and I open it. The 3 and a half pages of that letter almost made me cry and it made me laugh several times. (The elephants are weeping!!)   =) When I looked up, he proposed. I said No. (Ya think?)

This. Is. A. Pie.

;D


My kids will read this someday, my daughters will sigh and say something like, "I want to be proposed to next to a waterfall." And Jacob will cringe and I will smile and laugh. The boys will stick their tongues out and say, "Ew! Gross! Dad you DID that???" Too bad they used to think their Dad was cool. And then years and years later when they find that girl that they can't live without they will go to him and say, "Dad, you did it right. Help me." And my Jake will be glad to offer his advice on getting the girl to say yes. And they will already be suave lady killers thanks to my excellent teaching. We aren't pridefull or anything. ;)

So there is the story. The ring is a circle cut, which I had secretly liked better with my band anyway. It is simple and looks just like the picture I refered to before. Jessica was never missing by the way. ;)


RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!

Facing a mirror you see merely your own countenance; facing your child you finally understand how everyone else has seen you.

Daniel Raeburn, The New Yorker, 05-01-2006
 
 
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.

David Lloyd George (1863 - 1945)
 
 
To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age.

Thomas Bailey Aldrich, O Magazine, October 2003


Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.

Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988), Time Enough For Love

 
That best portion of a good man's life,

His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love.
William Wordsworth (1770 - 1850)


Person to person, moment to moment, as we love, we change the world.

Samahria Lyte Kaufman


Never give a party if you will be the most interesting person there.

Mickey Friedman

Funny Pages!!!!!!

 

 

It's been a while my good friends. A long while indeed.

Song of the blog: Turn To Stone_ Ingrid Michaelson

Wow.
Just Wow.
I really needed to be blogging this summer.
Yeah.
Definitely.

So what have I been up to?

Well, where do I start really?


This. Is. A. Blanket.

I will make one like this. =]

I have not yet run through a field of corn.

I have not gotten a job. (I know. Biggest disappointment of my life. Parsons, Kansas not exactly hoppin in the job department.)

I realized that I have become a very clean person and now living in my father's house I think it has gotten worse. I love to clean. I do not love being expected to clean. (Does that make sense?)

2/3 of Joplin, MO was flattened by a tornado. Our Stake Center is gone and so is everything around. I may mourn the memories, but a lot more are mourning for the loss of their families and homes. For weeks after that every storm felt like judgment day. Watching that on the news was one of the most frightening nights of my life. 

This. Is. Joplin.

This goes on for miles. It is truly a tragedy. Our Stake President lost his house and was injured. A minor injury and his family is ok. He was on the news too. That is a great man right there.

The interesting thing is, the street with the mall and all that? Untouched. Huh.

In other news, I also see this guy every weekend. His name is Jacob Willis. He thinks we're dating and stuff. Don't know where he got that idea. He also keeps asking me to marry him. Word on the street is, he's even saving up for a ring. I may or may not be in the process of making a temple dress. I may or may not be getting married next May. It's all a very likely possibility.

New song that is needed: Soldier_ Ingrid Michaelson

I kind of like this chick. She sings in a way that hits my ears just right.
This song is kind of specifically perfectly fitting my case in fact...


This. Is. A.... Ring.

I don't actually have one yet. But this, with a smaller diamond, is what we are looking for. I am a simple gal. I don't want a big flashy ring. The band I want is vintage too. Not too flashy. But perfectly fitting me. Are you all shocked enough yet? We aren't officially engaged I suppose. No ring, and I have not really said yes yet. Not in the formal, "Will you marry me?" "Yes." Sort of way. It's happening though. In 11 months. Maybe it's 10 now. I don't know. Next May. I like May 15th. That sounds like a perfect day to get married to Jacob Willis. This silly man who thinks he loves me. ;)


But hey! I'm getting caught up on my two shows today I hope. So You Think You Can Dance is on it's most intense and difficult season ever.
And glee is just fabulous. Just is.




RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!

If you explore beneath shyness or party chit-chat, you can sometimes turn a dull exchange into an intriguing one. I've found this to be particularly true in the case of professors or intellectuals, who are full of fascinating information, but need encouragement before they'll divulge it.

             Joyce Carol Oates (1938 - )

 
At the end of the day, whether or not those people are comfortable with how you're living your life doesn't matter. What matters is whether you're comfortable with it.
            Phillip C. McGraw, O Magazine, February 2003

 
Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for truth.

           Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)


Trees like to have kids climb on them, but trees are much bigger than we are, and much more forgiving.

          Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Old Tree, 1993


To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting.

          e e cummings (1894 - 1962)

 
All people want is someone to listen.

         Hugh Elliott, Standing Room Only weblog, May 8, 2003


FUNNY PAGES

Some kind ago in Navaho in a parking lot in Tokyo.

Song of the blog: Be Ok_ Ingrid Michaelson

"Can you die of happiness?" I feel it may be possible. There should be a roof to the amount of happy I have, but there doesn't seem to be. Every day adds more.

1: I sing, I dance, I eat peanut butter.
2: I had a real McChicken on monday. REAL. Not that spicy red crap that they call McChickens everywhere else. I'm starting to think that everyone outside the Midwest is crazy. Crazy people! Love them all. =)
3: I saw the Dodds. I tickled the children.
4: I flew on two airoplanes. I bought a pair of pink sunglasses in Vegas.
5: I bleached my Dad's bathtub. I washed all of his dishes(the ones that were rebelling by taking over the kitchen and harboring criminal mold substances). I vacuumed with Dominic.
6: I watched part of Scot Pilgrim with Shaun and Jacob. I listened to very loud music because no one here cares. I danced outside. I drew on Joe Beachner's muddy truck, "Heaven is here!" And he drew, "She's back!"
7: I get to see Jacob (Willis) this Friday, and every minute that goes by is a minute I'm counting down.
8: I chased down the ice cream man with the boys. (Shaun and Jacob). I ate ice cream.
9: I went to Wal-mart and visited Rachel and Amberly.
10: I bought a maroon bed sheet for my bed. I slept on it. I woke up every hour the first night because my

This. Is. A. Truck.

It does not really look like the one Jake bought....

11: Dad was working and I couldn't lock the door or he would be locked out. I was alone. I was freaked out. 12: Afeared. Afrighted. Scurred out mah mind. But I lived. Now I have a bat. Thank you Joe. (And I lock the door when I'm awake and I can answer it.)
13: I walked down the street to Colby's house. Several times.
14: I bought mother's day cards.
15: I am applying to Pizza Hut, and Dollar General, Taco Mayo, Sonic, everywhere within walking distance. Possibly Wal-mart.
16: I still have not unpacked. I need to clean out that closet. I think a troll is living in it.
17: I remember living in this in high school. I remember not minding very much. I don't know how that was possible.
18: I am drinking orange juice. The off-brand kind that I used to drink by the gallon. Not as good.
19: I am noticing more and more every day how much I have changed.
20: I am noticing every day how much my eyes have changed. I don't the world the same way anymore. I'm not the same Heaven. So earth is not the same earth.

"Can you die of happiness?" No. There is no ceiling. I plan to keep climbing. =)

RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!!!!!

If we discover a desire within us that nothing in this world can satisfy, also we should begin to wonder if perhaps we were created for another world.

C. S. Lewis (1898 - 1963), Mere Christianity

A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.

Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890 - 1969)

Keeping score of old scores and scars, getting even and one-upping, always make you less than you are.

Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)

Be courteous, be obliging, but don't give yourself over to be melted down for the benefit of the tallow trade.

                         George Eliot (1819 - 1880)

People might not get all they work for in this world, but they must certainly work for all they get.

Frederick Douglass (1817 - 1895)

Why Drastic Blogs Are Bad.

Song of the blog: Where've You Been_ Kathy Mattea

So when you are hurt, and it just seems like it's just going to keep happening for the rest of your life and you feel no hope and you are just depressed? Call a shrink. Do not write a blog.

What is it with us people these days that we think that is remotely private? "Having a hard time in life? Get on the internet!!" No. No people. No.

This. Is. Hope.

It's closer than it ever appears.

This Easter Sunday the Atonement felt more real to me than I think it ever has. Just because. I find it so amazing that no matter what we do, no matter where we are, the atonement can work in our lives. I thought of a phrase that I shan't soon forget. "I am a Daughter of God, and there is no off switch."

I am sitting here on the couch of my dear friend Camille's parents. The sliding glass doors spill light into the room and I am also texting Jake. I feel content with my life. I feel content with where it is going. All looks well from here. This house is one that I hope to kind of model my own after someday. With my own personal changes of course. =]

I want to just make a list of happy things. =] Things I'm thankful for in my life.

1: The Lord and His gospel.
    I would not be the same person without it, I wouldn't have the same future, I wouldn't be the same AT ALL without this in my life. I am so glad that I have the gospel to lead my life. =]

2: The internet. haha I dig it.

3: Jacob Willis. ;)

4: Music

5: My family

6: Potato Bread. Especially when it's made by Camille's mom. =]

7: The Dodd Family.

8: The Moss Family

9: Closets, and the fact that I fit in them. =]

10: Big Backyards.

11: Thomas S. Monson. Our beloved prophet.

12: Cherry Trees

13: Flowers That Aren't Roses

14: Bananas

15: My Laptop

16: Napkins

17: Airplanes

18: Lotion

19: Paint

20: Parks

21: My Cell Phone

22: Blogs

23: Quotes

RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!

Keep cool and you command everybody.

Louis de Saint-Just (1767 - 1794)

We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.

Walt Kelly (1913 - 1973), "Pogo" (comic strip)

It is only by following your deepest instinct that you can lead a rich life, and if you let your fear of consequence prevent you from following your deepest instinct, then your life will be safe, expedient and thin.

Katharine Butler Hathaway

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

Ogden Nash (1902 - 1971)

If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.

Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

The most potent muse of all is our own inner child.

Stephen Nachmanovitch

Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.

Danny Kaye (1913 - 1987)

Couches and envelopes and umbrellas.

Song of the blog: The Only Exception_ Paramore

I like to sing this song. This song will be played at my wedding. That day though, every day, seems to get farther away. Not that I'm in a hurry, but everyone wants it eventually right?

So lets rewrite this song right now. No one is the exception. Even though they come to you on an airoplane, spend two amazing days promising you things that you know deep down they can never promise. And you want to believe them. You want to believe them so much that you do. You trust. You trust them. And then 24 hours after that airoplane flies them away you are crashing back down to earth. To the reality of grass that will forever be grass. Just grass... Not even soft grass either.

This. Is. Grass.

It is not sherbert.

The fairytale is lucky to have such amazing mascots. I feel like I almost give up on it at least once a month. Every time another guy comes into my life and then decides he doesn't want to be there. Then I look at people like my Bishop here, and his wife. They have grown kids, and they are forever in the honeymoon. They are so in love. And I do things like read Nicole Dodd's blog, and read about how happy and joyful she is in her life with her husband. And then I do stupid things like say to myself, "Ok, the fairytale is worth it. Chin up darlin." And then I do stupid things like trust people. Guys to be exact. Stupid things that I do....

And then I do stupid things like wonder if I should give second chances. And I wonder if I will ever learn my lesson. How many times will I have to get hurt before I learn not to trust? It didn't even take him 24 hours this time....

No this is not Felix. This is not Richard. This is not any guy that I would ever expect it from. But really, I should expect it from them all. This was Jake.

And now I look around and I wonder about this summer, I wonder what will happen. How many more times will he call? How many more times will he apologize? How many more times will he hurt me? And then I think, "None." I am going to get a job at pizza hut this summer. I am going to go running every day. I am going to make cheesecake. I am going to go to Warped Tour and a System of a Down/Gogol Bordello concert with my Colby WeezyJefferson Johnson. And I am going to hang out with my Daddy. And I am going to remember what I should remember every day. That I don't need anything else. I don't need to sing of love, I don't need to forgive Jake, and I don't need to feel anything but peace. I just want peace. I thought this weekend that I had found something that could grow into love eventually. I thought that slowly it would grow and be something that I have never had before. A relationship that is based around Christ, around the right principles. But he made the decision to go see his ex and make out with her. Well... I guess that means that, once again, I was wrong.

This. Is. Sherbert.

It is not grass.

When I was younger I saw my Daddy cry and curse at the wind
He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it.
And now I have sworn that I will never let myself forget.

And that was the day that promised that I'd never sing of love if it does not exist.

Maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul that love never lasts.
And we've got to find other ways to make it alone and keep a straight face.

And I'll always live like this, keeping a comfortable distance
And I'll tell myself I'm content with loneliness
Because none of it is ever worth the risk.

I've got a tight grip on reality and I won't let go of whats in front of me here
I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up
I'll be left without the proof it's not a dream.

There are no exceptions.

Like my rewrite? Right now, I feel pretty sure of it. I dig it.

RANDOM QUOTES!!!!!!!!!!!

We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.

Robert Wilensky, speech at a 1996 conference

To say the least, a town life makes one more tolerant and liberal in one's judgement of others.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882), Hyperion, 1839

I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

Agatha Christie (1890 - 1976)

I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling, I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.

Mitch Hedberg (1968 - 2005)

Sometimes the mind, for reasons we don't necessarily understand, just decides to go to the store for a quart of milk.

Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Three Doctors, 1993

Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?

Spike Milligan, from "The Goon Show"

Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.

Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)

Here's a funny cartoon. =]

That's what my biology teacher did to our final to make us feel better about taking it. He put funny cartoons on it. I think it worked.